A good son

As we ate dinner last night mum said, "do you realise that this is the first dinner you have ever cooked."

I soon put her right on that one. For a start I'd cooked the night before. (You warmed up a ready made meal! - Ed) I had to remind her that when I was fourteen she buggered off to Italy for six months and, along with trying to be a model pupil, I was left to run the household for me and my father. I shopped, cooked, cleaned, ironed and generally did everything that was necessary for the smooth running of the house.

I don't remember my father lifting a finger (maybe that's where you get it from? - Ed).

As you can tell, I'm still scarred.