Not quite what it used to be

I feel like I'm falling to bits.


Over the last twelve months my teeth have started to crumble. Not massive breakages, but small pieces falling off. This year I have already had three crowns and there's another one to do. Appointments are already set up for next year. What's going on?


I think it's fair to say that this last twelve months I've been starting to feel a little less perfect. (Get a grip, you have no idea what perfect is - Ed) I know, I know, you're very surprised, but not as surprised as me. One minute you're god's gift to the world and the next you are starting to disintegrate.


I first noticed that things were changing about three years ago. Small memory gaps and that sort of thing and now my bloody teeth are falling to bits. Shit!


I stopped smoking about 13 years ago and nowadays I hardly drink so don't lecture me, I have been trying. (I suspect that it's all a bit too late - Ed)