57 Ways to hurt your lover

'A', 'T' and the children left this morning for the drive back to London, laden with local goodies. If you ever needed a knowledgeable recommendation about the price and quality of our local wines, then bearing in mind that this man's business supplies ingredients to most top London restaurants, he travelled back to England with a boot full of the stuff. They are a lovely family, great fun and love our dogs. We were very sorry to see them go.

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So, there you have it, it's now official. If you are going to throw baked beans at anyone make sure that they are in a take away tub and not in a tin. A tin would constitute a dangerous weapon and you would undoubtedly be prosecuted. Heinz, please note.