How to be more appealing to women

So I'm chatting to Jan over breakfast about someone we know (male) and she said that what made him appealing to women (her) was that he really listened to what you (she) was saying. As an aside, I said, "Is that what makes me appealing to you (darling)?", to which she replied, "NO!" So being a modern man, and determined to keep our relationship on track, I spent the next half hour trying to listen intently to what she had to say. The trouble was she was completing a soduko puzzle and didn't actually say anything at all and every time she looked up and saw me leering at her (listening intently) she threatened to slap my face. There's no pleasing some women.

***

Talking about not pleasing some women, Jan sent me this the other day:

After four long months of winter, we are finally coming up to spring and the BBQ season. Therefore, it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this outdoor cooking ritual, as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, and then only because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chains of events are put into motion:

1. The woman buys the food.
2. The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
3. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand. Here comes the important part:

4. THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

5. The woman then goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.

7. THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

8. The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes. And most important of all:
10. Everyone PRAISES THE MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off" and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women!