Not here, there

I was in a car park in Sommieres waiting for Jan, who had been in the optician for well over an hour. This wasn't anticipated but suddenly I needed the toilet. This happens more and more of late and I have toilets mapped out all over the place for such an eventuality. Anyway, the arene was just down the way and there was no one about. I have always admired the French penchant for peeing in public and I was about to join the throng. I parked the car and hid myself behind a small outbuilding just outside the arene. Bugger, a small white van pulled up behind me and the driver started shouting at me. It's difficult to hold a conversation mid-stream so I ignored him. When I was more comfortable I started to pay him attention. He told me in no uncertain terms that I shouldn't relieve myself there. Being half Italian and having developed the Gallic shrug I tried to ignore him. It ain't a sin and I needed to go, so that was it. Suddenly I realised that he sympathised. What he was trying to tell me was that I was actually pissing up the side of a toilet. A quick look round the other side confirmed his information. Bugger.