Saturday, August 05, 2006

Trust me, I'm a doctor



Last night, we eventually settled on the hotel's 'Il Giardino' restaurant for our last night's dinner. It was a warm still evening with a good atmosphere and the service was good. The food was good but not memorable. However, what was good was the wine waiter who looked after us well and who guided us through the Italian wine maze of which we have little knowledge. He did well, and so did we. Having had enough of fish because we had eaten it for the previous two nights, we both settled for meat, my beef was excellent, but Jan who is not a great meat eater was less happy. At least one of us made it.

By way of a bonus, I include a couple of snaps that I wasn't able to upload at the hotel. One, of the Russian Orthodox Church and the other of the pool. Don't say you don't get good value!


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HEALTH WARNING: If you have a nervous disposition or are about to eat a meal, skip the next paragraph.
We were fairly early to breakfast this morning so it was quiet, that is until this huge woman heaved into view. We had noticed her yesterday both at breakfast and in the pool. I omitted to say anything yesterday lest you think me an insensitive moron (you got it in one - Ed.). She obviously has a significant medical problem with skin lesions and is massively overweight. My beef is that for two days running she has worn the same, very small outfit to breakfast, lunch, and in the pool. What she wears is basically a swimming costume with a tiny little skirt. Lots of her hangs out of it - LOTS. It makes you feel sick to look at her. I got the impression that because of her problem everyone feels sorry for her, and rightly so, but hang on, let me tell you what she puts on her plate. At lunch yesterday she chose the most enormous piece of chocolate cake, basically it was a third of the cake. It was if she left the regular pieces that had been cut and took the remainder. She proceeded to eat half of it and leave the rest. Obviously something deep down in her tiny brain warned her that she was close to exploding. This morning at breakfast, after shouting her convoluted order for coffee to a bemused waiter she piled her plate with cakes and pastries and on a second trip she cleaned them out of butter and jam. This woman is not well and she was making matters massively worse. She was inappropriately dressed and I suspect that out of political correctness no one said anything. It actually flashed through my mind to pretend that I was a doctor and berate her for her gross stupidity and offensive behaviour. I didn't, shame on me.
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It had been a very enjoyable and comfortable few days but this morning we packed and headed off to Ventimiglia, about 14 kilometres away. On the way down we had noticed a supermarket and Jan wanted to top up on a few Italian goodies like olive oil (now comes in gold foil bottles), parmesan (it freezes), pancetta, provolone and scamorza (two of my favourite cheeses), Limoncello (one of Jan's favourites drinks) and Amaro Lucano (one of mine). Yum.


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The journey back took over an hour and a half longer than going because of heavy traffic. It would have been even longer if we didn't have the Telepeage. This neat little gizmo costs hardly anything and really come into its own when there are scores of cars queuing to get through the toll booths. I just don't understand why more people don't use them. You get a dedicated lane and pass through with the minimum of fuss. One of life's little mysteries.

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